Neither right nor wrong, only different!

July Blog by Carol Kandiko, CSA ~  I think I’ll begin with Adirondack chairs. My good friend extols their virtues as the most perfect summer seating experience possible. I once tried an Adirondack chair and found it very uncomfortable to sit in and almost impossible to get out of. I prefer sitting on a blanket on the grass. So which of us is right?

Think how many tensions in life arise out of the simple assumption that my preference is, if not the only one, surely the better or best one of all.

This rings true not only for small personal points of view, but also for a great deal of the division we experience in large collective stances. We tend to divide reality into right and wrong, good and bad, us and them, as if there are only two choices possible. But consider that most opposites can both be true. And, of course, there are usually more than two possibilities. Why else are there so many flavors of ice cream?

The greatest gift of our prayer circles at Centering Space is the unique variety of personal points of view that come together. After we sit together in silence anyone is welcome to share insights with the group. Those who do discover no judgment, no discussion, no attempt to fix or change or deny the truth of their experience. The acceptance of each one’s sharing may or may not reflect agreement, but the fact of its truth to the person speaking is honored and celebrated.

That is the relationship we strive for and usually achieve. Being human there is an occasional slip up, but the gift in that case is the acknowledgement of fault and forgiveness.

This morning in my prayer time Rumi shared a poem:
Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing,
there is a field. I’ll meet you there.  

When the soul lies down in that grass,
the world is too full to talk about.
Ideas, language, even the phrase each other
doesn’t make any sense.”
From The Essential Rumi translated by Coleman Barks with John Moyne.

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